Filmjitsu! The Podcast that wields films as deadly weapons

This week on Filmjitsu, Mike is subjected to Bolero, the infamous 1984 erotic drama directed by John Derek and starring his wife, Bo Derek, in what may be the most lavishly photographed vanity project ever unleashed upon unsuspecting audiences.Was this a genuinely misguided attempt at prestige filmmaking, or simply expensive late-night cable fodder pretending to be profound? Mike and Jay attempt to separate the silk scarves from the sleaze during the main review. Afterward, inspired by one of cinema’s purest examples of exploitation masquerading as art, the guys count down their Bottom Five Sleazy Art Films. From self-important erotic dramas to beautifully-shot cinematic skin flicks desperate for legitimacy, these are the movies that mistake tasteful lighting and international locations for substance. Then it’s time once again for Dueling Double Bills, where Mike and Jay take tangentially related movies and create competing double features either fit for the art house or destined for the video store back room. Finally, the cycle of cinematic vengeance continues when Mike reveals what fresh madness Jay will be forced to endure on the next episode.

On this episode of the podcast that wields films like deadly weapons, the guys return from a brief hiatus to tackle one of the strangest high-concept movies of the last decade: The Man Who Killed Hitler and Then the Bigfoot. Starring the eternally weathered and deeply mustachioed Sam Elliott, the film answers its wacky title with meditations on aging, government conspiracies, and wartime trauma. Fun! Can a man with a voice aged in bourbon barrels—and enough quiet manliness to make the Marlboro Man—look like a ballerina hold together a movie this ambitiously bizarre? Jay and Mike offer their thoughts, then count down their Bottom Five Microgenres: those hyper-specific cinematic niches that severely test the patience of the co-hosts. Along the way, a few beloved films catch stray bullets, including Ray, Black Beauty, and Freaky Friday. Then it’s time for an unexpectedly combative round of Dueling Double Bills before Jay once again reveals what fresh cinematic suffering Mike will endure on the next episode.

On this special “From the Vault” episode of the podcast that wields films like deadly weapons, Jay and Mike hit pause on their usual cycle of cinematic punishment to dig into the archives and revisit a piece of Filmjitsu history. With many of the most infamous “bad movie” staples already covered during the show’s original run, some titles have been left in limbo... until now. This week, the vault opens on Showgirls and listeners are taken back to 2010, where a much younger Mike, alongside original co-host John, tries to make sense of Paul Verhoeven’s neon-drenched spectacle of excess. Along the way, the guys count down their Bottom Five Movie Dances, square off in a round of Matinee Deathmatch—naming films within a chosen theme until one host taps out—and then close things out with a pair of Staff Picks to cleanse the palate after all the cinematic carnage. Next week, the torment resumes, as Mike’s revenge continues and Jay reports back on The Man Who Killed Hitler and Then the Bigfoot as scheduled.

On this episode of the podcast that wields films like deadly weapons, Mike is sent straight into the molten chaos of Volcano (1997), the disaster of a disaster movie starring Tommy Lee Jones, Anne Heche, and what appears to be a Hell of a lot of molten Velveeta flowing through the streets of Los Angeles. Directed by Mick Jackson, this late-’90s spectacle swaps out an actual volcano for an endless surge of lava, asking audiences to accept city management and seismology as a substitute for action. After Mike’s review, the guys count down their Bottom Five Misnamed Movies, picks that highlight some seriously misleading marketing with titles that just plain don’t match the movie they’re attached to. Then it’s time for Dueling Double Bills, as the guys square off with another pair of loosely connected double features before Mike closes things out by assigning Jay his next cinematic punishment, because on Filmjitsu the cycle of suffering never truly cools.

On this episode of the podcast that wields films like deadly weapons, Jay is forced to endure Roar (1981), the infamous “no animals were harmed” production where, somehow, nearly every human involved absolutely was. Starring Tippi Hedren and directed by Noel Marshall, this real-life experiment in living alongside big cats quickly becomes a chaotic showcase of exactly why that should never be attempted on film or otherwise. After the main review and a heartfelt and unexpected eulogy for a long-passed dear friend, the guys count down their Bottom Five Cats. From domestic nuisances to full-on man-eating nightmares, these are cinema’s least effective, most frustrating, and downright dangerous felines. Then, the show welcomes back Dueling Double Bills, as Mike and Jay once again square off with a pair of loosely connected double features and argue over whose picks actually make sense. Finally, because vengeance is a dish best served immediately, Jay closes the loop by assigning Mike his next punishment, proving once again that on Filmjitsu, the cycle of cinematic suffering never truly ends.