The Mama Circle

Today, I’m talking about something that feels deeply uncomfortable for a lot of us, needing help when the numbers stop adding up.
Through the lens of motherhood, separation, and navigating finances, I share what it’s been like to realise that I can’t actually do this alone. Not because I’ve done something wrong, but because the reality of modern motherhood often doesn’t add up financially.
I talk about the shame that can come up when asking for help, especially financial help, and where that shame actually comes from.
This isn’t just about money. It’s about identity, independence, and the stories we carry about what it means to be someone who “should be able to manage”.
In this episode:
what happens when your income and expenses stop aligning in motherhood
why asking for help can feel so uncomfortable
the difference between personal failure and structural reality
how cultural and class conditioning shapes our relationship with money and support
why systems like benefits and subsidies exist in the first place
If you’ve ever felt like you shouldn’t need help, this episode is for you.
🎧 Free resource: The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs
A short audio guide exploring the types of support modern motherhood requires, and where those gaps often are.
👉🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.
We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode?
TikTok @nataliek.martin Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠
☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

In this episode, I’m sharing the idea that sits underneath so much of this podcast: the motherhood debt.
It’s the hidden cost of becoming a mother, not just financially, but emotionally, relationally, mentally and practically too.
I talk about the moment I realised I felt like I was drowning, why so many mums end up blaming themselves, and what I started to notice in conversations with other women.
Different struggles. Same underlying weight.
I also break down the different debts so many of us carry, from identity and relationships to time, energy, support and money.
This episode is the foundation for everything that follows. If motherhood has ever felt heavier than you expected, this will put language to it.

🎧 Mentioned in this episode:
The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs, where I talk more about the support structures modern mothers are navigating.
👉🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.
We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode? Comment on Spotify or:
Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠
☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📢 Don’t forget to follow the podcast so you never miss an episode
New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

In this episode, Natalie reflects on how expectations around Mother’s Day can quietly shift after children arrive. What was once about celebrating your own mum can suddenly become multi-generational, bringing different traditions, assumptions, and sometimes tension about how the day should be spent.
Natalie also explores a deeper question: do mothers actually need one day of appreciation, or something more consistent than that?
Flowers, cards, and breakfast in bed are lovely, but they are not the same as everyday support. In modern motherhood, the small, practical moments of care and shared responsibility often matter far more than symbolic gestures once a year.
This episode looks at how resentment in relationships often builds through tiny moments over time, and why the opposite is also true. Small acts of support can quietly strengthen a partnership and help mothers feel less alone in the weight of family life.
Natalie also introduces the idea behind her Five Villages Every Mum Needs framework, which explores the different forms of support mothers need in modern life.
If Mother’s Day has ever felt more complicated than joyful, this conversation will likely resonate.
If this resonates, you can download my free audio guide, The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs, where I talk more about the support structures modern mothers are navigating.
👉🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.
We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode? Comment on Spotify or:
Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠
☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📢 Don’t forget to follow the podcast so you never miss an episode
New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

You’re told to stay calm. Keep explaining. Offer choices. Negotiate gently. But what happens when you’ve repeated yourself ten times and nothing changes?
In this episode of The Mama Circle Podcast, Nat shares a shift she’s been experimenting with during the toddler years: stepping away from endless negotiation and allowing safe, natural consequences to do the teaching instead with FAFO (F*ck Around, Find Out) parenting.
This isn’t about abandoning gentle parenting or becoming stricter. It’s about recognising that much of modern parenting advice assumes unlimited patience, time and emotional capacity, conditions most parents simply don’t have.
Because parenting doesn’t happen in ideal circumstances. It happens when you’re tired, running late, overstimulated, and trying to hold an entire household together at the same time.
Drawing from real-life toddler moments, Nat explores what changed when she stopped trying to control every outcome and started getting curious instead of exhausted.
Inside this episode:
why negotiation stops working with some toddlers

parenting strong-willed children without constant conflict

the exhaustion of endless repetition

boundaries versus “being soft” in modern parenting culture

letting go of control without becoming harsh or reactive

why toddlers often learn through experience rather than explanation

If you’ve ever felt like you’re failing because parenting feels harder than it’s supposed to, this episode offers a different perspective.
You’re not doing it wrong. You’re parenting inside real constraints.
If this resonates, you can download my free audio guide, The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs, where I talk more about the support structures modern mothers are navigating.
👉🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.
We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode? Comment on Spotify or:
Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠
☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📢 Don’t forget to follow the podcast so you never miss an episode
New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.

When we fall in love, we don’t sit down and map out how we’d separate.
We assume love will carry us.
But love is not a custody plan.
In this episode, I talk about something that might feel uncomfortable at first: what if we treated parenting like the structural commitment it is? What if we had the hard conversations about childcare, money, mobility and decision-making before resentment, betrayal or grief enter the room?
Because most couples only negotiate structure once they’re already hurt.
I share how navigating co-parenting after separation opened my eyes to how much of family life is built on hope. And how quickly hope collapses when structure hasn’t been defined.
This is not about predicting failure.
It’s about protecting children from the worst versions of adults in pain.
We talk about:
Why breakups become so volatile once kids are involved

The emotional weight behind child maintenance

Mobility, relocation and parental responsibility

Why clarity is not unromantic

How systems like custody law shape what’s possible

If motherhood creates invisible debt, then relationship debt is one of the most expensive.
And pretending love alone will carry it is what leaves so many families fighting when they’re already bleeding.
If this resonates, you can download my free audio guide, The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs, where I talk more about the support structures modern mothers are navigating.
👉🏽 ⁠⁠⁠The 5 Villages Every Mum Needs⁠⁠⁠⁠

🫂 Join a loving community of mums in IT'S A LOT – free for 30 days.
We talk about this kind of stuff in It's A Lot. So, if you’re feeling shaky having brought your new baby home, in the trenches of toddlerhood or just need a place to share the joys of being a mama with people who get it, this is your new support network. The best part? It’s all via voice notes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.nataliekmartin.com/mama-circle⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Want to share your thoughts on this episode? Comment on Spotify or:
Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natalie.kmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠
☕️ Support my work: if you’re enjoying my podcast, you can buy me a virtual coffee here! Thank you 🫶🏽 ⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/nataliekmartin⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📢 Don’t forget to follow the podcast so you never miss an episode
New episodes every Wednesday🎧 Subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and leave a quick review — it really helps other mums find the show.